A younger sister in the Lord, asked me about the balancing act of being a mom and specifically, how I took care of three girls with patient teaching, and consistent discipline? How I found time to workout, and spend time with God? How I cooked and cleaned and found time to relax and still be productive?
WOW, I think all of us mom's have wondered how other people do this. This is basically what I shared with her and hoped maybe some of you may be encouraged as well. I appreciate all the good examples of Godly Moms I have in my life and pray I can be of help to someone else through some of the lessons I'm learning along the way.......
I by no means have this "balancing act" all figured out and would never be mistaken as an expert on the subject. I only have my experience thus far to refer to and the lessons I'm learning along the way......
Let me start by just saying you have to take it one day at a time. We are in a "season" of life. Each phase will be unique with it's joys and challenges but no phase will last forever. Our kids will not stay little. Live fully in the moment everyday and don't compare it to yesterday or waste it hoping for tomorrow.
You have to figure out what works the best for your family. Only you can decide that. It may not look the same as what it seems "everyone else" is doing. Decide what sort of things are nonnegotiable for your family in your daily schedule and do your best to keep that a priority. For us, we decided that the girls' eating, sleeping, and bathtime/bedtime routine needed to be as consistent as possible. They pretty much eat, sleep, take their bath and go to bed at the same times and in the same pattern everyday. These are basic needs they have and by meeting them in a consistent way we have found it not only gives them a sense of security but helps them feel their best, keep the rest of the day more peaceful and helps the other daily activities go a little more smoothly. Be realistic, keep things simple and don't set yourself up for failure. Be flexible with the things you can.
Being a parent is not easy. Having someone depend on you 24/7 is not always fun. Life w/ kids is unpredictable and full of variables. There are days I have felt like a complete failure. I have lost my patience and let a very small child get the best of me. I've been too lazy, spent too much time on facebook, or even just plain felt sorry for myself. Never underestimate the significance of repentance and forgiveness. It releases you to let go of what's already been done and move forward in freedom.
I try to keep some basic order to our day. We always pick up the toys at naptime and bedtime. We try to be consistent in our discipline and without the Lord in me, I could never be patient. LOL :) I don't cook everyday and I often wish my house was cleaner. My girls aren't always even dressed before two in the afternoon. I try to find time when I know I have help with the girls, to work out, relax, or spend time with friends. Somedays there just isn't time or help and you just do what has to be done. I want to spend more time in the Word than I do but I have found that there are countless ways to enjoy the Lord in the midst of my everyday activities. I love to pray while I shower or while I am holding a clingy child. When I sing to the girls at naptime I like to sing choruses or prayers and just enjoy a time of worship. I am learning to judge my success by my obedience to the Lord throughout my day rather than by the appearance of everything around me or even the opinions of others.
We are on a journey with the Lord learning the fine art of self-discipline for the purpose of holiness. We have to learn to embrace the benefits instead of resisting the hardships. I have found that praise and thankfulness are the best way to keep my mouth, mind and heart from going to ugly places and protects me from giving the enemy any ground. God arranges our environment in the very best way for us to gain Him but we have to choose not to resist Him and to be supplied by Him. He saves us in our circumstances.
Be encouraged, He is everything we are not, and He never intended for us to be stuck in an endless battle of defeat. Last but not least....
Pray, Pray, Pray, and pray some more, and again, take it one day at a time.